Are you on a direct path or are you a hopeless wanderer? Ready, aim (part 2)

I find that when I am not moving steadily toward a goal, but simply following the next new shiny thing, I just end up wandering in circles. Have you experienced this as well?

In part 1 of this 2-part series called “Ready, Aim,” we looked at some of the reasons you may be floundering, and in part 2 we’re going to explore ways to advance on your way to success.

Most of us have too much going on in our lives to be able to wholeheartedly pursue a big goal, but there are ways we can break that goal into smaller parts, and work toward it a little bit at a time. In fact, I have found it more useful to target smaller goals in various areas of my life so that I’m more rounded and stable.

In his book and training called EntreLeadership, author and radio personality Dave Ramsey details the idea of setting goals in different areas of your life or the “wheel of life” as outlined by Zig Ziglar. Ramsey says, “for our lives to be successful as a whole we must address each area. The spokes of goal setting are: career, financial, spiritual, physical, intellectual, family, social.”

He goes on to say that if you only focus on some of these areas, you will have, in essence, “a flat tire.”

One of the things I struggle with the most is balancing the areas of my life, so I end up spending more time on career, physical and intellectual pursuits and neglect other areas, especially family and social. Because my “big 3” areas come easier for me, that’s what I focus on and end up procrastinating on planning for the other areas. I’m learning to set more practical goals in each of the areas, with steps that are reasonable and measurable so I can see my progress.

Once you have SET your goals, the next step is to start making progress toward accomplishing them. I have found a secret though – break those goals down into manageable bites. The following steps can help make the process less overwhelming:

• Focus on one or two areas each week: don’t set yourself up for failure by trying to accomplish all of your goals at once. Take it slow and focus on one or two “spokes” at a time. Maybe this week you aim to work on physical (maybe walking for 30 minutes two days) and social (meet a friend for coffee). Ease into it.
• Determine specific next actions: if you are like me, seeing something like “Sally’s birthday” on my to-do list makes my eyes glaze over and I skip it altogether. But if I decide what the next action is to move it forward, I am more likely to make time to work on it. For instance, the first step might be to “talk to Sally to pick a date for the celebration.” That’s probably a phone call, so that’s something concrete I can work into my week. Be sure to determine next actions for each of your goals.
• Use your calendar: I don’t know about you, but I am much more likely to pay attention to items on my calendar than things on a lengthy to-do list. So make it simple and add the action step to your calendar. Sculpt time to accomplish that next step. One of my goals is to read and study one business book each month. I have limited time to read, often at night before bed, when I tend to fall asleep in the book and then have to reread the next night. Not very conducive to great study.  So I have started blocking out a couple of hours on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon to read with a reminder on my computer, so that my time does not slip away. That chime of the reminder helps me stay on track.
• Start some good habits: Try setting your alarm 15 or 30 minutes earlier in the morning, and use that extra time to exercise, or pray and study the Bible, if those are some of your goals. If you are consistent, then before long, you won’t even be tempted to hit snooze because you will find yourself feeling better because you see progress.
• Celebrate progress: When you do make significant progress on your goals, take a few minutes to rejoice in that. Share your success with your accountability partner or family. Don’t get lazy though – be happy that you are moving in the right direction and get back to work on that next step!

By taking small steps in the right direction, you will start making visible progress on a particular goal, which will spur progress on other goals. Just think what you can accomplish as you stop wandering and head on a straight path!

What small steps can you take now to get you back on track for your larger goals?

 

What is stopping you from achieving your goals? Ready, aim (part 1)

I find it scary how fast time seems to go by these days. It seems like it was just the beginning of summer, and here it is almost Thanksgiving!

With the end of the year so close, it’s time to evaluate your progress on your goals for this year, and start thinking about goals and dreams for next year. In part 1 of this 2-part series called “Ready, Aim,” we will look at some of the reasons you may be floundering, and in part 2 on Friday, explore ways to advance on your way to success.

Some of the biggest roadblocks to achieving goals include:

• Unreasonable goals. I frequently have grand ideas of what I want to accomplish, but then the nitty gritty of every day keeps me sidetracked, and suddenly that goal seems unreachable.
• Uncertainty about how to proceed. Some goals can be intimidating, and you find yourself stumbling over what the next step should be. That can lead to procrastination because it seems too difficult to figure out or deal with.
• Someone else’s goals. Be honest here, how many times have you set goals because family or friends encouraged (ok, pushed) you to – but you weren’t 100% sold on the idea yourself? It is hard to buy into a goal about which you are not passionate.
• Vague results. Goals must be clear and measurable. You’ve heard this before – don’t set a goal like “lose weight” – because how will you ever know when you have succeeded? You will be more likely to achieve success if you set a reasonable goal like “lose 10 pounds by X date.”

For me, goals help me manage my life, so my life doesn’t manage me. When I set sensible goals with realistic results, the outcome is much more satisfying.

The problem comes when I haven’t set proper goals to begin with. Then they become just another obligation to avoid, and it ends up being detrimental to my peace and contentment.

To counteract these problems, here are some down-to-earth tactics that will help you meet your goals:

• Set reasonable goals. It’s ok to dream about owning the company, but if you are just getting started, it’s probably not a realistic goal for next year. Start with achievable goals that move you in the right direction. You might strive to “take # classes to build leadership skills” or “train X team members to take on X responsibility.”
• Break the goal down into steps. You aren’t going to reach your goal in one leap, so don’t set yourself up for failure by stating it that way. Spend some time planning what action steps it will take to reach that lofty goal. If your goal is to run a 10K in 6 months, but you haven’t exercised in years, the first step would be to walk a mile 3 times a week. Then plan to walk a longer distance more often. Then add running.
• Set goals for you. Decide what you need to accomplish for you and set goals around that. Don’t be influenced by others here – you have to be passionate about what you want to achieve or you will not make progress.
• State what “wildly successful” looks like. How will you know when you’ve reached your goal if you haven’t stated what finished is?
• Share your goal. That’s right – don’t keep it to yourself. State it out loud to someone you trust and who can encourage you. Even better, challenge a friend or family member to help hold you accountable by asking about your progress periodically.

Goals are worthless if you aren’t making progress toward them, and determining the barriers is only part of the challenge. In part 2 of the series “Ready, Aim,” we will explore the process of setting up better goals to help you reach your dreams.

What excuses are keeping you from accomplishing your goals?

 

Unexpected Benefits

When I decided to participate in Chris Brogan’s three-word challenge last December, I had no idea of the impact it would have on my life. I chose my three words, CONNECT, TRAIN, ENJOY, as areas of my life that I felt needed some improvement, but underestimated the power of focus that I’ve rarely experienced with other kinds of goal-setting.

The idea of choosing three words is that while resolutions are usually forgotten by the end of January, your three words become the lens through which you view your activities and focus throughout the whole year. For me, it has been like a touchstone that keeps me grounded as I plan and schedule and make decisions.

For instance, I have been very intentional about connecting with people with similar interests and activities, and in addition to new connections through my work and church, I am now part of several online communities which provide great support and encouragement in not just leadership and writing, but in spiritual matters as well.

With a focus on training to improve my writing skills, I am participating in Chris Brogan’s Blog Topics Master Class, which has stretched and challenged me for several months, and helped me expand my skills and comfort zone. Plus, the benefits of this learning will continue as classmates and I pursue some ongoing projects.

Learning to enjoy has been my biggest challenge of the three words. I’m not sure what I envisioned when I chose the word – certainly not long vacations or pricey excursions.

What I have discovered is that I’m more aware of what brings me joy and I seek opportunities to experience it. My time spent writing and running each morning, curling up with a good book with one of my cats in my lap, or a conversation with family or a friend. These are joyful times within the grind of the every day, and I’m much more in tune so I can take advantage of those moments.

As I consider my three words for 2013, I have been much more cognizant of the power of this kind of focus. In looking back at my success for 2012, I am amazed at the power of three little words. It is very important to choose the right ones.

What will your three words be for 2013?

 

How do you handle those challenging days?

Every have one of those days (or weeks) when you just cannot stay focused to accomplish anything? And it’s a day (or week) when you NEED to get a lot done? How do you handle that?

I have to rely on discipline. Through the last few months, I’m learning the value of putting habits in place and sticking with them. Sure, you cut yourself a little slack every once in a while, but there is great value in creating solid habits to move you toward your goals, even when you can’t seem to focus on them.

For me, that means getting up early and setting aside time to write and run, every day. Even weekends. Even the days when I really want to stay in bed. Even the days when it’s cold outside, and I just want to curl up and hide.

But the benefit of that discipline is that later in the day, I can be satisfied with the knowledge that yes, I exercised both my mind and my body. I did get my blog written (or at least drafted) and I did run my miles.

And in the long run, having accomplished both of those things makes me happier and more effective in other areas of my life. (And less crabby as a general rule.)

The beauty of discipline is that when those habits are in place, there’s less consideration of IF I will do this. Autopilot kicks in and I just find myself DOING it. It’s time to write, so I sit down and write. Time to go run, and I just head out. No thinking about it, just do it. And once I go ahead and get started, I find that it is usually the best part of my day.

The rewards are great. The rest of my day tends to be more effective because I’ve gotten started on the right track.

What disciplines do you have in place and how are you rewarded by them?

 

Making the most of time

I know I am not the only one who has way too much to do right now, so let me ask, how do you get it all done?

I’ll be honest, I have been overwhelmed for several months now – with commitments, meetings, projects – the list goes on and on. My days keep my head spinning, and when I get home, I’m tired, my brain feels like mush, and I stare at the computer for a little while, then give up and go to bed.

As I have struggled to figure out how to eke more productivity out of my day, I’ve realized being more intentional in my planning is the way to make progress.

A little disclaimer here – this list is mostly for me, as a reminder of what I need to be doing, and I hope that it benefits you as well! So here are some of the things I’m doing to be more productive:

• Take 15 minutes at the end of your day to plan the next day – ok, this one is tough. By the end of the day, I’m just ready to go home! But what I have discovered is that taking the time to jot down the few most important things I need to tackle the next day – and even leave a stack with notes to myself on my desk – helps me hit the ground running in the morning.
• Schedule an appointment on your calendar to get projects done – my days tend to be so full of interruptions and “putting out of fires,” that sometimes the only way for me to get some projects done is to block out a few hours on my calendar. It helps me to be intentional with my focus during that time, and I’m much more likely to actually hunker down and do the work, instead of continually pushing it to “later.” I’ve been trying to get changes made on a training handbook, and it took the appointment WITH the reminder for me to spend the time to finish it. Feels great to have it out for review now.
• Don’t seek perfection – sometimes you have to be willing for something to be “good enough” so you can move on to more critical things. And usually, “good enough” is just fine!
• What can you delegate? This one is hard for me, but there are times that I am not the best person to do things, or the only person who can do things. I need to be more willing to delegate some tasks so that I can focus on what only I can do.
• What can you let go of? Some of the things on my plate may need to be moved to a “someday/maybe” category, or let go of completely.
• Don’t put off – dreading may be worse than doing. How much mental energy are you spending worrying about that task that then grows in your mind to an all-day thing? Just go ahead and get it done – I bet it won’t be NEARLY as bad as your mind built it up to be. Then you free up that mental energy to focus on more worthwhile things!
• Batch jobs – this is another one that’s hard for me. Some days I flit from task to task – email, small change on the website, data entry for a bit, then on to something else. I’m much more effective if I group like things together – all the changes on the website at once, respond to email all at once instead of throughout the day, etc.

Taking time to plan may be your most effective use of time today.  Being more intentional in managing your day instead of letting it manage you, should help you get more done and allow you to carve out time for you. How nice to be able to let work go at the end of the day and enjoy spending time with your family.

How can you utilize your time more efficiently?

 

A party of one – being happy by yourself

Do you thrive on being surrounded by people and feeding on their energy, or do you crave time spent alone?

Most of us are with people throughout the day at work, at home, maybe a carpool, school sports or activities if you have kids, then there’s your Facebook community, email, Twitter. There is such richness in community, when you can share ideas, support each other and enjoy just being together.

One of my three words this year has been CONNECT – and I have sought out ways to connect with people, both physically and virtually. But as much as I enjoy and learn from conversations in person and online and being a part of the party, there are times when it becomes overwhelming and I need to retreat.

Interacting is treasured, but I find equal value in solitary pursuits, even if it is just for short blocks of time, snatched here and there.

With our overbooked lives, it may be difficult to find solitude, but it can be a critical tool in helping you cope with the busyness. Whether you get up a little early, find a quiet moment after dinner or before bed, or simply unhook from social media for a block of time, you will benefit from time spent alone to:

• Plan your day – let’s face it, most of the time, our days get away from us, but taking a few minutes at the beginning of the day to plan a few things you need to accomplish helps you be more intentional. Update your task list, calendar or notepad, and keep your two or three main responsibilities front and center to help you stay more focused all day.
• Be creative – whether you write, paint, sew or scrapbook, feeding your inner artist will release energy and clarity that will invigorate you and change your mood. You’ll have to be intentional to find a longer block of time for this, but it will help you enjoy the other parts of your life even more!
• Quiet and center your mind – the chatter of the world can be disorienting and distracting. A short time spent in silence, either in meditation, prayer or just doing nothing can quiet the noise and allow for better concentration and calm. Even just a few deep breaths with eyes closed can do wonders!
• Process your day – take a few minutes at the end of your day to celebrate your accomplishments and be thankful. Writing in a journal is a great way to record your thoughts and unpack your day. When you are journaling for your eyes only, you can contemplate events or feelings without fear of judgment or criticism. Amazing ideas and solutions may emerge.

Extended periods of time alone won’t happen often for many of us, but even just 5 or 10 minutes of intentional solitude during your day can lead to more focus and motivation. I challenge you to seek some time to yourself.

And when you do, how will you thrive during your solitary time?

 

Is it time for a checkup?

Photo courtesy of Jacob Metcalf (Creative Commons)

I had my yearly physical yesterday, and it made me think of other areas of my life that probably need to have a regular checkup. Yet I neglect those areas because I’m too busy right now, or not in the right frame of mind, or think I have it all figured out already. But do I really?

To be truly happy, you need to balance the different areas of your life. In rereading Dave Ramsey’s EntreLeadership book, I am reminded of the “wheel of life” that  he describes from Zig Ziglar. “The wheel has spokes that represent each area of our lives, and for our lives to be successful as a whole we must address each area. The spokes of goal setting are: career, financial, spiritual, physical, intellectual, family, social.”

My “wheel of life” tends to not be round, what about yours? I freely admit that I am a workaholic, so my career and intellectual spokes tend to get the bulk of my focus, while I neglect other areas.

I suggest a regular time to do a “checkup,” whether that is yearly, quarterly or even monthly, so you can get back on track before you’ve veered too far off the road. The following steps can help you balance your “wheel of life”:

• Review – schedule a block of uninterrupted time to take a hard look at the last few weeks or months of your tasks and your calendar to see where you have been spending your energy. Just be honest in looking at your appointments and commitments to see what you spend your time on. This is not time to kick yourself for spending your time on the wrong areas, just an assessment of what you have been doing.
• Refocus – consider your “wheel of life” goals (or jot some down if you haven’t done that before). What are your goals in the different areas of your life (career, financial, spiritual, physical, intellectual, family, social)? What do you hope to accomplish or emphasize in each of those areas over the next few weeks and months?
• Realign – is one area of the “wheel of life” getting more attention than the others? There may be seasons when you focus more on a particular area, such as work, but be sure to balance that with the other areas or you risk burnout and frustration. Write down a new goal in each of your life areas for the coming months (writing makes it harder to ignore – just be sure to keep those written goals visible!).
• Renew – make some pledges to yourself (and maybe to your family too) to be more accountable for your new goals. Place your written goals on your desk, in your calendar, or somewhere that you will see them frequently.

By doing a regular goal checkup, you can adjust your priorities and even out your “wheel of life,” which will lead to greater satisfaction in all the areas of your life. Even if there is an area that will continue to need more focus in the next few weeks, be intentional in your goals for the other areas and you won’t lose that balance.

How round is your “wheel of life” and what do you need to do to even it out?

 

What does this word “NO” mean?

Photo courtesy of Horia Varlan (Creative Commons)

I am not well-acquainted with the word “no.” Anyone else have that problem?

It’s not always a bad thing, because people know they can ask me to do something, and most of the time, I will agree. Being dependable is a good thing, right?

And many times, even if the thing I have said yes to is a stretch, I feel like I’ve grown a bit once I’ve successfully completed the task or activity. Growing is good.

But being constantly busy can have its drawbacks. I write this after several weeks when I have had hardly a moment to myself, and had to schedule my days solid in order to prepare for the commitments I had made.  My recent activities have been exciting, fulfilling, and satisfying – just too many all together! I am exhausted and have had little time for me.

So how can you be more intentional in your busyness? Consider the following steps before saying YES to any new commitment – large or small:

• Pause – instead of an automatic “yes,” respond with “let me consider this and get back to you.” Then go through the rest of these steps.
• Pray – for guidance and knowledge that this new activity or request is part of God’s plan for you
• Plan – look at your calendar and/or your Life Plan and long term goals to make sure this new activity fits and does not conflict with a prior commitment (depending, of course, on the size of the obligation – an afternoon picnic is a little different than joining a new committee).
• Prepare – make sure to build in time for preparation for the obligation, whether that means preparing the food for the picnic or doing the background reading, writing the agenda, etc.
• Protect – “you” time. Michael Hyatt has written about “margin” (read his post here) and his “ideal week” in terms of protecting time spent with family and personal development. Look through the lens of your “ideal week” before committing to new things so that you can protect that margin time. It’s hard to be effective when you are overly tired or distracted by the next thing.

How different would your life be if you followed these steps before saying “yes”? Imagine how effective your meetings would be if you were more prepared. Your children would benefit from your complete focus and not a distracted or rushed parent. You could spend time on your own goals for fitness, health or learning.

How do you say “no” so that you can say “yes” better?

 

What are you letting get in your way?

Photo by amslerPIX (Creative Commons)

I ran in the rain this morning. It wasn’t a downpour, and it wasn’t thundering, but it was definitely raining. I still managed 5 miles.

On the way back, I started asking myself was I just crazy to be out there, or very resolute in pursuing my fitness goals? How do you tell the difference?

I thought about what I’m letting get in the way of accomplishing my work goals. Interruptions, mini-crises, and mind-numbing busywork take up a lot of my time lately. Maybe it’s time to rethink how I approach my work day. I’m tired of making excuses for why some of my projects aren’t finished. It’s time to stay on task and get things done.

What about you? When you face road blocks, do you seek a way around them so you can continue to succeed, or do you abandon the goal when faced with adversity? Have you settled for a mediocre job because you were turned down too many times in a job search? Have you just accepted that weight is a problem because you fell off your diet goals over the weekend? Are you enduring a frustrating situation because your Plan A didn’t work?

As we start a new week, let’s consider these questions. What do you need to address and/or put in place to make sure you stay on track with your goals for work? For your personal life?

What road block are you letting stop you from reaching your goals?

 

Bloom where you are planted

Photo courtesy of Tom Hilton (Creative Commons)

Are you so focused on the “next stage” of your life that you are forgetting to LIVE in today? Thoughts such as, “if I can just get through graduation,” “once I finish this project,” or “when this health issue is resolved,” shouldn’t be the excuse not to focus on this moment.

Denial can be a natural response to difficult circumstances. We want some confidence that things will get better and easier, and it’s less painful to dream about those future days than focus on the misery we’re in today.

What we are going through should not be overlooked, since it can be the catalyst to becoming stronger, smarter, more experienced or more grateful.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance.    Romans 5:3

What are some ways to make the most of your “now,” while working toward your “new”?

• Acknowledge the difficulty: It’s ok to admit that you are stressed, but embrace the struggle rather than deny it, and look for the positive points. Who have you met that you otherwise would not have? What strengths within yourself have come out that you weren’t aware of?
• Create celebration points: Designate some small landmarks or goals and celebrate when you reach them. It could be as simple as getting a latte when you have gotten your next chapter written, or have a movie night with your family or friends when the current class or round of treatment is completed.
• Engage: Look for opportunities to engage with others going through the same difficulty. Find a study or support group, or invite others in your class to go to lunch once a week to share war stories and encourage each other.
• Reach out to others: Turn the focus outside your own struggle. Volunteer an hour or two. Go visit in a nursing home. Doing something for others can help us better appreciate our own situation.
• Be intentional about today: Look for special moments or beauty around you. Notice the sunrise. Be attentive to your spouse or child. Seek things to be grateful for right where you are today.

How can you focus on being the best you can be now, on your way to that next phase? What step will you take to “bloom” right now, right where you are?